Only 90’s Kids Remember PREHYSTERIA!!!

So, a bit earlier today I was roaming around the internets, as I’m wont to do. Monday’s are especially slow here at the Bronx office of UTF, so I decided to delve a little too greedily and too deep into youtubes. Usually not a good idea, right?

Well, in between Russian dash cam videos and random recordings of popping cysts, I rediscovered something long lost. Prehysteria! Remember that flick?

… In all honesty, neither do I. At least, not that well. But I totally DO remember the super cool, miniature dinosaurs that the film starred. I’m not sure if I was already knee-deep in my dinosaur loving phase, or if Prehysteria! started me down that path, but it totally filled a niche in my heart. From that first viewing, through the 78th, my passion was for Dinos, and in that I was insatiable (I’ll give you $20 if you can name that quote).

After reading a bit of Wikipedia, which is the natural next destination after random youtube videos, I’m surprised to see that Prehysteria was such a huge hit. I mean… who else would’ve watched it?

You have to realize, Prehysteria was a video rental hit. Before the dawn of the internet, average peasants drove to their local VHS Shop (a Blockbusters, if their town was lucky enough), scavenged through aisles and aisles of mediocre flicks, in the dire hope that one of these strange cartridge devices would hold a somewhat entertaining movie. The struggle was super real. It was in the midst of this era that Prehysteria was released, lodging itself into my dinosaur adoring mind, and never left. As a booger picking 5 year old, I couldn’t imagine other kids around the world were simultaneously discovering this well hid treasure. I’m sure I would’ve been offended, too, if other kids latched on to this movie. You know… because I was a 5 year old hipster and I totally loved Prehysteria before anyone else. I still love it!

These screenshots are so lo res it hurts
These screenshots are so lo res it hurts

Not more than Jurassic Park, though. Prehysteria and its mini monsters can’t compete with Steven Spielberg’s. Sorry Elvis. I know you’re a dapper tiny T-Rex, but the raptor-devouring big guy from JP won my heart.

Check out the full movie below. If you’ve never seen it, you’re in for a real treat. For any 90’s nostalgia junkies, roll up your sleeves and inject this magic into your disgustingly collapsed veins.

Oh, sorry, that might’ve been a bit too visceral. I just opened another tab to watch Trainspotting. Today’s gonna be a slow one.

Author
Heyo. I'm Nick Dourian, the Editor-In-Chief around these parts. Now, I went to a few other sites, read a few awesome bios, and I really want to fabricate a badass origins story for myself, but I'm feeling particularly unimaginative today, so 'f' that jazz. I read comics, drink bourbon, and cook meats. Imagine Ron Swanson, but with a fuller beard and cuter eyes.