stahma

5 Big Queer Geeky Weddings That Should Happen to Celebrate the Death of DOMA


In case you missed it yesterday… THE DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE ACT (DOMA) WAS DECLARED UNCONSTITUTIONAL!! The internet literally exploded with rainbow flags. It’s a great way to end LGBTQ Pride Month.  But for the geeks for equality out there, I thought I’d offer up a nerdier celebration.  Here are 5 couples that should tie the knot in celebration of this (long overdue) step towards social equality in the U.S.!

Batwoman (Kate Kane) & Maggie Sawyer

Kate and Maggie have had flirty repertoire ever since they first met on the pages of the rebooted Batwoman in 2006 and they hooked up not long after. By issue #17, Kate risked it all and exposed her Batwoman identity by proposing to Mags in full Bat costume. It’s four months and four issues later and I’m feenin’ for some wedding bells. Batwoman is pretty much the most high-profile lesbian character in comics (who wasn’t relegated to an alternate universe at that), so this wedding oughta be Huuge and super awesome. Come on, just imagine the complementing black & red tuxes… right?!

Hulkling (Teddy Altman) & Wiccan (Billy Kaplan)

Since their first days as Young Avengers, Hulkling and Wiccan have been bum-buddies. There were only subtle hints at first, and a lot of early readers picked up on something deeper than just friendship. Eventually it’s revealed that the two are in a relationship, and it’s not-so-subtly hinted that the other Young Avengers knew anyway when they suggest Billy change his name to Wiccan to avoid any haterade from the press about his orientation and his then chosen name “Asgardian”. Both coming from pretty screwed up weird and mysterious origins, Teddy and Billy have  a lot in common. Both are kind-of parentless, incredibly powerful, and supremely defensive of each other. They’re also painfully sweet and lovey. For crissake Hulking draws Wiccan out of a severe depression by proposing!  This wedding would be that adorable “they’re so young and pretty and sweet” kinda “aww” wedding we all hope for once every decade so we can vomit from all the mushy cuteness. So, let’s do.

Stahma Tarr & Kenya Rosewater

Okay so this one is a lot of wishful thinking, but when big things like the government actually supporting gay rights are happening, we gotta dare to dream big.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve been absolutely adoring this duo. They’re pretty much perfect for each other, both straddling that strange complex line where they are both incredibly strong and powerful women, yet they have found themselves in abusive relationships. This past Monday’s episode really sealed it for me; we got a glimpse of Kenya‘s painful past and a chance to see Stahma‘s seeming deferent, sweet manipulation of Datak slip into actual rage for once.  These two ladies have had to play it sly and cunning to make it as women in both the new and old worlds, but with each other they’re all honesty and shy stolen smiles. I’d love LOVE to see Stahma give Datak a  biting toodle loo and walk off with her lady love. Also, Kenya and Nolan? I just don’t see it. He’s so gonna go governor. Move on and up, Kenya.

Captain Jack Harkness & The 12th Doctor

Okay… I know, I’m pushing it again, but let a dreamer dream, eh? That poor, charming, love-sick man deserves a shot with The Doctor, especially considering he got shut down for someone as laaame as Rose… Just sayin’. So, here’s the idea. The 12th Doctor regenerates and lo! this time he’s significantly less heteronormative (which always struck me as odd considering the whole alien thing. Why would a species that can theoretically regenerate into any form/gender/sex/race conform to particularly Earthling sexuality? I mean if sexuality was rigid on Gallifrey and a happy Gallifreyan is all happily married then his wife regens into a husband… problem? Anyway…). What could be a more perfect pair than the time-travelling, alien-hunting, charmer who can’t die and the time-hopping, death-defying doofball with one life to spare? Imagine the adventures! And Jack loved him straight through the regeneration between 9th and 10th Doctor; whereas Rose was all struggly. Frankly, I was shocked the 9th Doctor wasn’t into it in the first place. I mean, just look at that adorable man! Besides, that whole “wedding” with River happened in reverse, right? So technically, The Doctor is still single…  And aaand, Jack occasionally likes the ladies too, so if the next Doctor has lady parts, it still works!

Donner (Gerri Brauer) & Blitzen (Valerie Kameya) 

Alright I’ve dropped enough long-shot daydreams now. Donner and Blitzen are way overdue for a classy sassy wedding. These two have been together since 1994, as one of the first positive super-powered lesbian couples in comics. They may not be the best-known  couple but they’ve been around a long time, defiantly and ostentatiously in love. Sarcastic and bold, these two fought side-by-side as a part of Milestone ComicsShadow Cabinet and later Heroes teams after appearing in IconTruly dynamic characters, both come from pasts full of mistakes and hardships, though those pasts are somewhat veiled and mysterious given the short run of the Milestone imprint. This couple never really got their due, despite being way ahead of their time as a powerful and stable queer couple in comics in the 90’s. It’s about time they had a nice small wedding, with lots of booze and everyone sighing sighs of relief that justice is finally arriving.

Happy LGBTQ Pride Month, everyone!

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Crystal (@geekoutsider) is an assistant editor at a respectable publishing house by day, by cover of night she goes full on geeky. You can see her writing at geekoutsider.com

S#!T Talking Central

  • Tracey

    Wot no Midnighter and Apollo? My fave gay married couple…

    • Crystal Paul

      YES! Love them, they’d totally make my top 5 married couples! These are the weddingsI hope will happen soon (hint hint studios/publishers…). there should totally just be a nerdy season of geeky queer weddings now that DOMA’s dead.

      • Tracey

        I’m not sure they’re still married in the reboot of the reboot, actually (though they are together). I’d watch that wedding!

  • Tracey

    Also I LOVE Batwoman & Mags, and Billy & Teddy…

    • Crystal Paul

      How could anyone not?! I love the witty snarkery of Mags and Kate. Billy & Teddy are just too adorable for words

      • Tracey

        Yup! Though I have to say (shameless plug alert) my favourite gay-soon-to-be-married couple is the one in my own books ; ) Well, I wrote them, I have to love them, right? My fave thing about writing is if you get annoyed at the lack of representation in mainstream geekery you just write your own…! (OK, to be fair, Teddy and Billy a VERY close second).

        • Crystal Paul

          Ha! Fair enough and Oh so true re: representation. Glad there are folk out there makin’ it happen! When’s your book out? Gimme gimme!

          • Tracey

            Not sure where you’re based but here’s the UK link (is also in US). One of the main leads is POC lesbian and 2nd book (Wolf Night) is more about her, as it’s basically about various forces trying to thwart her wedding to her Scottish GF. I obviously love them both as they’re based in part on friends of mine (who doesn’t love a no-bullshit Scot?). Even as a straight white person I got sick of the paranormal universe where everyone seems to be a straight white person, especially in a city like London, which is incredibly diverse. I also wanted to write a (separate) love triangle where one of the male participants actually liked *both* of the other (male and female) people in the triangle because I was sick of books like Anita Blake where bisexuality is usually a convenient plot device at the service of the main lead rather than an actual genuine way of being.

            http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dark-Dates-Cassandra-Chronicles-ebook/dp/B007RH5PF4/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1341315028&sr=1-1