The Top 5 Totally Lame X-Men Who Used To Be Cool

Remember back in the day, when the X-Men were cooler than Iceman’s vacation to Hoth?  I’m talking ’bout the height of their popularity- the mid 90’s, baby!  But like the Spice Girls, Pogs, slap bracelets and flannel, some things cannot stay hip forever.  Today we are looking at:

The Top 5 Totally Lame X-Men Who Used To Be Cool

Bishop

bishop 2

Bishop used to be totally bad@$$.  The timeline from which he originated was a complete warzone, yet he continued to fight for Xavier’s dream against all odds.  He was the epitomy of 90’s cool- a ridiculously ripped, time traveling anti-hero with big guns.  He even had a cool as heck eye tattoo.  Flash forward twenty years, and somehow he became the dude that tried to kill a baby.  Yeah, you read that right, his arch-enemy is an infant.  And while fighting with the baby, Bishop accidently shot Professor X.  But, here is the worst part, after the “villain” turn and some more time-warpy fun, when Marvel decided to bring him back they hardly acknowledged the attempted baby-murder fiasco.

Beast

beast

Back in the 90’s, Beastie boy was the super-smart, fuzzy scientist dude who made clever jokes and dated hot human newscasters.  Today, he is the original X-Man who stabbed his friends in the back and pretty much destroyed the time stream.  Yup, he sucks.

Gambit

gambit 2

Believe it or not, Gambit used to be the dude every teenaged boy wanted to be.  He was the definition of mutant swag.  Gambit was the ragin’ Cajun, exotic and smooth; all the ladies loved him, but his heart belonged to one of the most gorgeous women in comics- Rogue.  Gambit was a mysterious bad boy who overcame his dark past.  Fast-forward twenty years, now Gambit is not even on a main X-team.  Seriously, if the X-Men picked teams in gym class, he would be the dork no one wants to draft.  He lost the girl, lost his cigarettes and now comes off as that thirty year old lame dude that always talks about his reputation in high school.

Archangel

archangel

I still cannot believe this dude was ever cool.  Just two years ago, the Dark Angel Saga was the most talked about comic in all of the multiverse.  It was awesome because it took the blonde, pretty boy, millionaire schmuck and made him a totally hip, murderous madman.  Of course, his lover Psylocke was forced to destroy his mind to stop him, and now he is a total pretty boy douche, again.  Oy.

Wolverine

wolverine

Wolverine used to be the indestructible, tortured, mysterious, anti-authority loner who hooked up with hot Japanese and Native American chicks.  He was the dude who tamed his animalistic urges to stand for mutant rights.  Today, he IS the damn authority!  Seriously, he’s a member of the freakin’ Avengers- they’re the definition of “the man.”  Oh yeah, how is this for rebellious? He’s a freakin’ headmaster of a school.  He has no more mysterious back story because most of his origin has been told… and it includes him being a really, really rich kid And his cool healing factor? It’s gone.  I will never forgive this @$$hole for Avengers Vs. X-Men.  He turned his back on his own people and if he had his way, would have killed Hope before she was able to resurrect the mutant gene.  I try not to swear in my columns but screw it, fuck you, Wolvie.  

Sooooooooo, who do you think shoulda made the list?  

Author
Jay Deitcher is a writer and licensed social worker from Albany, NY. He is currently taking MFA courses at the College of St. Rose. You can read his other work at JayDeitcher.com.
  • Fokker

    X-Force #116 was the end of Marvel for me, that was the end of my comic collection. They went full retard with that title and have been doing dumb crap with the story lines ever since.

    • adam

      thats when they become what would become x-static right? I remember getting that first issue of x-force in the mail and i am like “what the f**k is thi sh*t?”

      • jk9090

        imo x-statix was ok,but they shouldn’t have sold it as x-force before re-labeling it,that ruined the one good liefeld thing in comics.

        • adam

          I agree. even x force at their worst I thought was better than x-static. I might have to go back and read it. the art really turned me off. IMO the best x force was the beginning and after AOA.

  • Marcell Hines

    Wolverine has actually come a long way. Him running the school is him trying to keep with Xavier’s legacy which Scott should have been doing instead blaming the “man” AKA SHIELD for everything. As for AvX Wolverine was only one who made sense imo, I mean yeah he probably could have found an alternative to killing Hope but he seemed to be the only one that remembered that THE PHOENIX DESTROYS EVERYTHING IT TOUCHES. Which is another thing Cyclops should have known, seeing as how the last 2 times it came to Earth his wife died and things got worse. He had no evidence to back up that it would restart the mutant gene. It was just some wild guess brought out by desperation and bad writing.

    Logan didn’t care about being an Avenger or being an X-Man, he was being a person, a survivor. All that “loyalty” crap goes out the window when you can see the big picture.

    • Steve

      “bad writing”

      And there you have the entirety of X-Men vs. Avengers. However, there were actually plenty of times that Cyclops interacted with the Phoenix Force and it didn’t result in someone he loved dying. In X-Men: Phoenix – Endsong, he actually has some pretty emotional moments with the Phoenix Force. In fact, the Phoenix Force itself feels a strong connection to Cyclops, as it seeks him out.

      Was Cyclops’s judgment clouded by his emotions? Most definitely. Is this article about Cyclops’s decision-making skills? No. It’s about Wolverine, whose solution to “what should we do about the Phoenix” was “kill the person who might be able to save our species.” There’s absolutely nothing reasonable about that.

      And guess what? It turns out that for all of his issues, Cyclops was right, at least more right than Wolverine was. Tony Stark even tells Cyclops that he knew that the outcome of the situation would be the restoration of the mutant species.

      Wolverine used to be the guy who would do the bad thing to bring about a good result. Now, he’s an uptight, self-righteous jerk. He has a higher body count than the rest of the Marvel Universe combined, but he got indignant about Cyclops killing one person – while possessed by an uncontrollable cosmic entity. Hey, remember when the Dark Phoenix wiped out an entire planet, killing billions? The first thing Cyclops tried to do with the Phoenix Force was make a better world for everybody, and only one person died because of his actions (Namor acted independently of Cyclops and the rest of the Phoenix Force). That says a lot about his character.

      • Reece

        If Namor could act independently under the influence of oh so mighty Phoenix Force, then why couldn’t Cyclops stop himself from killing Xavier? Nothing justifies murdering an innocent but the story demanded an explosive ending after lacklustre 11 issues and we got that. The writers wanted it this way, that is all is there to say, really. The entire story became redundant and irrelevant so quickly that they even brought back the original X-Men from the past. Yes, blame the characters but not the overreaching storytelling by the writers to cover up one pile of crap after another.

    • Jester1137

      Well, as you can see, Authoritarian freaks are happy to have their biases confirmed.

  • joe

    If you have Beast and Wolverine on this list. You haven’t read a comic in the past 5 years.

    • Steve

      I think you’re the one who hasn’t read a comic in the past 5 years. Beast endangered the entire time-space continuum, lied about a “mutant genocide,” and was generally selfish because he wanted to try to stick it to Scott Summers. This all happened within the past year or so, by the way. You might want to catch up.

  • Indiana Bones

    I agree that Beast now sucks (at least in All New X-Men). The problem here is that the characters are subject to the whim of whichever creative team the Marvel brass thinks is cool. So now you have a completely idiotic version of Angel, the Beast screws up the time-space continuum (no to mention no two artists draw him the same way), and Wolverine is overexposed. Hopefully they go through with killing him this year

  • Rob Grizzly

    Thought this article might actually have something interesting to say. My mistake

  • Matthew Hickman

    Gambit was never cool

    • mfactor

      Yes he was

      • Just another person on the int

        No.

        • Glasso

          Yes.

          • Xmenexpert

            No Gambit sucked hard since his introduction, as did Beast, Angel, and Bishop.

          • Brian Zaiger

            Beast is an OG member. Have respect.

          • Brian Zaiger

            Beast is an OG member. Have respect.

          • Pax Humana

            The same thing is true with Angel/Archangel, so either respect it or get lost!

    • ed_ross

      In 1993, me and every other preteen boy I knew wanted to be Gambit. We’d get trench coats, cut certain fingers off our gloves and waste hours trying to learn to throw playing cards with precision. Even back then, Wolverine was way over-exposed and we were sick of countless stories designed to make him look cooler than everyone. Gambit presented a roguish badboy alternative who knew how to have fun, and didn’t have to be a dbag to all of the other characters to prove he was cool. When I revisited comics in the 2000s I was horrified at the tattered remains of the character everyone was expecting to be more popular than Wolverine.

      • Nice Marmot

        See? I tell people not every geek with a trench coat is planning a school shooting . . .

      • Norm

        Me too. Gambit was definitely my fave, with Wolverine as a close 2nd. It started going downhill when “Wolv”(To me, “wolvie” just sounds stupid) lost his adamantium. X-Men #25 when it happened was phenominal and, in my opinion, one of the best comics I have ever read. But after? Wolverine leaving and Sabretooth joining the X-men, but having to wear a muzzle? Lame. Venom should have been on the list as well. The Lethal Protector series was pretty good, but went downhill from there. In Funeral Pyre, “Pyre, promise not to hurt us and we will save you.” That was NOT to same Venom who attempted to flatten Spiderman with a tank in Amazing Spiderman #300. I understand bringing new storylines to appeal to the new younger generation, but the state of a lot of comics now, with the art(Loved Mark Bagley’s work in ASM) and storylines, they’re just depressing.

  • John Beveridge

    you know who used to be cool, and still is? cable and deadpool. although, deadpool is getting dangerously close to over-saturation.

  • Jake Lloyd

    I couldn’t agree more regarding Wolverine. I know the writers of Avengers vs X-Men wanted to make Cyclops the bad guy but having Wolverine backstab his team mates so fast and easy really turned me off of this character. The overexposure ( naming a book Wolverine and the X-men – really??) doesnt help either. I mean Iron Man is arguably more popular and recognized than Wolvie but we didn’t get a Iron Man and the Avengers book, in which all the avengers suddenly kiss Tony’s ass.

    • Andrew Rawlings

      The book was named ‘Wolverine and the X-men’ in order to try to attract watchers of the cartoon of the same name (with which shares a name and very little else). The cartoon was named that to try to attract fans of Wolverine (the most popular X-man, and arguable the most popular character in the MU (Deadpool/Wolvie-on-steroids) is catching up). He’s over-saturated BECAUSE he’s popular and simply putting him on the cover is a sure fire way to get some people to buy it. Personally I’m with you on the name change (esp. given he isn’t even the focus of the book half the time) but hey when you have a cash cow you milk it (why do you think he’s on the Avengers? His skill set? His personality? Nope it’s his sales).

  • Kuma

    Whoever wrote this articles is one of the guys that Quesada considered when making One Day More.

  • writer

    The last best x-men arch in my opinion was with onslaught. This whole new mutant messiah, the Bishop villain angle, the wolverine castration, the cyclops insanity, the gambit taming… all of this and more, in my opinion, the x-men characters have been completely rewritten, and ruined in my opinion. I personally feel it is bad writing and I find myself venturing more towards DC comics these days.

  • Zero_1_Zerum

    I blame Marvel’s wonderful cadre of writers, not the characters. They can’t help how they were written, or drawn. But, I have to say, I miss the 90s.

    • Mike Huckabee

      really? I was 2-12 during the 90s, so it’s not like I was actively reading comics at the time, but I understand that era to be a very, very dark time for comic books.

      • jk9090

        heroes reborn,the birth of image comics,the bankruptcy and subsequent sale of movie rights for marvel characters,yeah,dark times indeed. (no sarcasm) (for real tho,no sarcasm)

        • Andreas Berg Melson

          yeah the 80’s were golden, and the 0’s were very good (from House of M, I loved the whole no more mutants thing 😛 ) Spiderman is argh though … just kill off PP and let Miguel O’hara take his place. No it isn’t pretty, but it’s better than the whole reboot thing (sighs audibly)

    • hendrixisgod777

      I miss the 90s too.

  • Brandon

    You missed Cable.

  • samuel

    yeah the stuff marvel has done with Bishop, Beast and Wolverine makes no sense.
    Bishop tries to kill hope instead kills Xavier but now that Xavier was revived and killed by Cyclops he’s cool now?

    Beast is just an a**hole after all the the horrible things Xavier has done Cyclops killing him should be a free pass but everyone is mad at him for not being able to control the phoenix ya know the thing not even his wife Jean could do. its not even Scott’s fault things went this way its Hank’s for joining up with the Avengers and breaking the phoenix into five parts that possessed the X-men instead of hope

    Wolverine this guy has killed heroes in Mark Millar’s Wolverine enemy of the state and yet gets a free pass that pisses me of the most.

  • Robert Saggers

    Why are these articles
    1. Always written by people who don’t appear to have a great deal of knowledge on the subject and
    2. Always negative, I think I’d much rather read about characters who have become cool (or interesting) after poor or dull starts.
    But maybe written by someone who doesn’t have to “try not to swear”.

  • Dwayne Young

    Apparently you didn’t read any Uncanny X-Force, there was a multi issue story arc all about Bishop and Hope, where she almost killed him for hunting her down all those years, also Gambit is on X-Factor, one of the current 6 X-Teams, as for Angel and Wolverine, good characters like people in real life change over time, not a single character in comics is the same as they were 15 years ago or when they were first created

  • Droppo

    To me, most of what is complained about in this article never happened. I collected comic books aggressively from 1979 to 1992. After that, it got bad fast, so I quit. I am so glad I did. I can have memories of the X-men as they were. Gambit had just been introduced about the time I left, so I barely know him at all. Wolverine was his old self. Spiderman was the one and only Peter Parker, not a clone or a future version or a hispanic kid. Things were still pretty much the way they had been since the characters had become the iconic characters that people think of. I believe I quit at just the right time. I still buy comics from time to time, but only from during the pre-1992 years that I loved so much. There are plenty of good stories out there I never had the chance to buy at the time.

  • Cretien

    Bishop?! Cool!? A bloke with a jheri curl mullet and pimp moustache!? Bloody hell at least now he has natural hair and a full on proper beard.

    • Andreas Berg Melson

      remember 1992? He was SO cool back then, and so was Gambit. Stop judging by todays standard, and start remembering

      • Cretien

        Do I remember 1992? Well I was 21 back then and a bit of an arse so I like to try and forget but yeah I remember it quite well. I remember thinking what is it with this mullet thing? Even black characters are inflicted with it. I’m British by the way, mullets where never really that cool here. Or at least among my peers they weren’t.

        • Pax Humana

          You are like your user name and that other name that you also referred to yourself earlier still applies to you, sir.

          • Cretien

            Sorry dear but its not a username it’s my real name because I’m not enough of a coward to hide behind a pseudonym so I can’t help but be “like” it, whatever that refers to. And as for the other I already admitted to it so…sorry what was your point again?

      • Nice Marmot

        The beginning of the end for me. Add a dash of Cable, stir in some Deadpool . . .

  • Sentry616

    Opinions are like arseholes, everyone has one, and yours is a puss leaking stretched out wreck and no-one wants to see it.

  • dr4hearts91

    Dude, Wolverine used to be a nothing character that Chris Claremont tried to eliminate. He’s only cool because of John “Nobody Gives Me Credit” Byrne. I’m saying he’s kinda in his own category: A nothing character who became cool, and then became a schmuck again.

    • GC001

      The X-Men MAY have been much better off IF Claremont had gotten his wish.
      Wolverine’s only occasionally interesting and useful. Most of the time, he’s an annoying, hyperviolent jerk. Maybe he should have been the one killed off in X-Men #95 instead of Thunderbird (I). Seriously.
      I think Wolvie tends to overshine a lot of other X-characters that frankly can be more interesting and have more satisfying stories written about them.
      I didn’t really understand WHY they put him and Spider-Man in the Avengers other than that’s what BMB wanted… and I never thought BMB was that good of a writer, either.

  • M_C.Vallely

    Fuck you

  • http://flyingtigercomics.wordpress.com/ Flying Tiger Comics

    How did you get your job writing this shit? I ask because there are several subnormal kids at the mall who are always looking for work, and this is definitely within their intellectual capacity.

  • NIcodemus

    This post isn’t about lame characters… it’s about personal beefs with storylines… don’t like it… stop reading the comic… I’ll give you Bishop…. but it stops there… welcome to comic book arcs bud

  • Ex-wolverine fan

    Wolverine has sucked ever since they gave him those lame bone claws.

    • Andreas Berg Melson

      no, no rhw bone claws were really cool, with the adamantium skeleton only Magneto can defeat him and he turned good (or maybe Scott turned evil) Suddenly Wolverine wasn’t undefeatable, his claws could break, and he’d have to wait for them to grow out. I loved that. He sucked since he became all civilized on simulteaneously on at least 1 X-Men book, his own book, at least 1 Avengers book, and whatever series and/or crossover Marvel think will sell 20% better with him on the cover

  • Smokey

    Right… Thanks for your opinion there…

  • Gonzalo Adrian Battaglia

    You blame Wolverine for Avengers Vs. X-Men? You know he’s a fictional character right? Blame the creators doing X-Men now. They totally screwed up the characters. X-Men is now too convoluted and the characters are in no way true to their personalities. Others have pointed out that now Wolverine is whatever the writers or editors want him to be for the given project. This is true of many other characters. I can appreciate Cyclops going off the deep end due to his struggles and fundamentally repressed nature but that doesn’t make him a good character. X-Men has always been a soap opera, but now they are really wallowing in melodrama. Personally I would currently include ALL the X-men in this list… except that some were never cool. (Bishop being one)

  • logat890

    Wolverine is a pretty boring character to read on his lonesome. Its the audiences fault Hugh Jackedman became the focus of the movies which in turn influenced the comic books to spotlight the character. Bishop and Gambit were kinda lame from the get go anyway..

  • logat890

    Bob Harras and Quesada happened!

    • Andreas Berg Melson

      Quesada is a disaster. That man needs a to retire. Both as a writer and as an executive. Peter David and Michael Brian Davis rule 😛 And I have to say I’m really looking forward to the Spiderman 2099 (taking place today)

  • Dre Day

    I kinda agree about the Wolverine one. But I guess you could his “character change” as evolution/character growth.

  • Gene

    I have always despised Gambit. He was a product more than a character. What Poochie was for The Itchy & Scratchy Show, Gambit is for the X-Men. The only difference is that some readers actually took the bait.

    • logat890

      you can blame Jim Lee for Gambit and his stupid head gear!

  • Misfit_commentor

    This is the fate of all DC and Marvel Comics. They keep milking characters to keep selling books, and to do they you have to make the heroes do outrageous things all the time to capture people’s attention. Dying, murdering, going crazy, turning bad, betraying, marrying and divorcing, going out of the closet, gaining a new vice, unexpected relative … The one strategy I hate the most is the alternative dimension/universe, almost equaled by the horrible clone cliché.

  • Vagabond

    Let’s face it, if you’re a fan of the old Marvel universe, you may not be so enamoured by the current one. The thing about comics is that it constantly renews itself to attract new readers of the current generation. I feel the new storylines suck, especially the new Spiderman ones, but it’s no longer our era. We’re no longer the target market. They need new customers, they need to be relevant to them.

  • Nice Marmot

    Or we could just admit that the X-Comics in general used to be cool and now aren’t.

  • Belell

    the x-men were not at their peak of popularity in the mid 90’s. they sold the most copies then, because marvel stopped producing stories and started producing paper with colored ink on it. they were pumping out 40 bajillion variant covers per issue and comic collecting speculators ate it up like the shit sandwich it was.
    marvel continues its death spiral on reader loss with apparently zero clue on how to get out it.

  • etertert

    Marvel movies + Wikipedia = influx of pretentious douche-bags. Don’t take this shit to heart guys, the douche that wrote this will get his when a real fan calls him on his shit…

  • Grungebreath

    Are people actually paid to write garbage “articles” like this?

  • Phillip Russertt

    I agree with this list but with some of the characters for different reasons. Beast because of his constant mutating and is now a blue ape and once had horse hooves that just disappeared thanks Grant Morrison. Gambit because of that alter ego created by apocolypse with white hair that resurfaced for a minute and is gone (was lame anyway). Archangel for the reason that they made him a mindless pretty boy now. Bishop was right on except they did make a story arc about his attempting to kill a baby. Finally the worst decline of a character of all…Wolverine. I agree characters should evolve and change but his appeal was not knowing his origin, why must we always know? also his developement was too drastic after many decades of him being rough and crass and hardass. he then evolved to a noble samari type which seemed to be a natrual evolution but now hes the new charles xavier? that seems to big a leap and an unrealistic evolution of this character. He is also over used and now will be killed as a gimmick just to be brought back soon enough. Characters can change and evolve as we all do but good writers like Claremont will do it in a way that makes sense to the character not to make them more appealing to an audience or to draw from the movie version. ie: 6ft 2inch handsome hugh jackman as opposed to 5ft 2 inch rough and gruff ornary ass kicker. just my opinion.

  • Rob Jarvis

    Dead on about Wolverine . . . . . just more indication that Marvel is assassinating their own comics (X-Men) because of Disney’s war against Fox studios. What a joke.

  • Randy Daniel

    Seriously, if the X-Men picked teams in gym class, Gambit would be the kid that no one thought could dunk, crossing over all your favorites, and having your girl talking after class, like where you from, what’s your name? And in some comics he never lost the girl (Rebecca Lebeau and Oliver Raven) and don’t lie if you still trying to throw a card across the room like it’s really going to hurt someone thank gambit.

  • leorick

    Ghost rider. Simply cuz he was all “I’m gonna own this curse” got rid of it for awhile, got it back then got rid of it again then his younger brother got the ghost rider powers then he got rid of it before it returned back to Johnny Blaze yet AGAIN

  • Ivan

    Take gambit out of the list and it will be perfect!!!

  • Droppo

    Not much they have done even matters anymore. Comics died around 1995 and there hasn’t been much reason to consider anything that has happened since then as real. To me, Wolverine is still indestructible and mysterious. Gambit was just introduced, and I avoided him from the start. There is only one X-men team, and it doesn’t consist of 45 people. No former members of the Hellfire Club are part of the X–men. That stuff just never happened. I still collect comics, but I only buy them from 1970 to 1995. There is PLENTY to read from those years. I will never run out of things to buy, and I won’t be half as disappointed as I would be if I bought something from post-1995.

    • Pax Humana

      Seriously, Droppo?

  • bobbyflavor

    Was this piece of shit written by a 14 year old?

  • Don Turner

    The movies killed my Phoenix fantasy! They could have and should have made Jean Grey’s transition into the Phoenix a lot better!

  • phylwx

    Spot on.

  • HERVE MEHOU-LOKO

    Marvel made some BIG mistakes with their caractherization of superheroes at the end of the nineties. Comics have become lame simply because they did let the movies dictate the comics and not the other way around. The perfect example is WOLVERINE. It seems that is the only character marvel has now. Wolvie is undestructable, has super strengh now, is an X-Men, Avenger blablabla….He is just dull. He is obsessive about a girl he never had. They have destroyed other characters for the benefit of Wolvie (Cyclops mainly, Cable to some extent, Bishop and even Gambit and Deadpool not to talk about Creed).
    I have become tired of Wolverine. The Marvel NOW! is totally wrong influenced by Hollywood’s politically coorectness. Comics were fun Because they were a free roaming universe. They had nothing to do with reality.
    The X-Men are no more Superheroes just Mutant foculizing and the Mutant vs Human War (wich is tiresome).
    They Introduced Hollywood writers into the comics and comics became stupid.
    I cannot watc another X-Men movie without wanting to puke (especially a wolverine movie with an actor that has no other career choice and is not even good in the role anymore just a mere cliché. The last Wolvie movie was Just Idiotic)
    As for Beast and the X-Men from the past scenario…..What the heck!
    Bishop…Oh Bishop!
    The came up with House of M and again wolvie is the one that remembers everything, not Bishop like the Age Of Apocalypse but again….The now Marvel Superman WOLVERINE why?????

  • Ty Mellon

    The 90’s SUCKED for comic books. What about all the great character development in the late 70’s and early-mid 80’s?

  • Glen Dale Bball

    With everyone being offended with everything written or seen in movies to comics, this caused downfall of badass heroes. Marvel being mainstream and top label in comics and now Disney owned, they chose to cater to younger audiences where if a chils mom picked up a comic and saw wolverine smoking would think right away its what comi s are about… smoking. Sowho gets the blame on lame-ing of characters? Those who find everything in comics offensive. This hero smokes, this hero is a playboy, no third sex in comicdom etc. Comicbook world should have not been touched by our struggles in real life and should have stayed to their characters. It used to be a world where when you read, you were in another awesome place.

  • Andrew Rawlings

    Bishop:”Marvel hardly decided to mention the baby murdering fiasco” except the last we heard of him being a fight between the two X-Force teams when said baby (Hope) attempted to murder him right back. You know hardly anything really.

  • Noctis Smith

    the writer of this article was never cool and will never be cool. ^__________________________^

    • Boogie

      Sounds like your lame ass.

  • RedMercury

    Actually, I stopped reading comic books years ago–like many, I stayed through the 90s and probably quit in the early/mid 2000s.

    That said, my favorite was Jubilee–especially when paired with Wolverine, though she was usually good with the X-Men. The attitude was perfect.

    One of my favorite scenes was in one of the X-Men books (I know I have it somewhere and I occasionally try to find it) when the X-Men are looking for Cable. It’s the very serious discussion about how they plan to find Cable and, I think it might have been Scott who details the plan and finishes it with, “…and then we’ll get Cable!”

    Jubilee pipes in with, “Ooh! Awesome! Can we get MTV? And maybe the hair care channel for Beast?”

    She was the one who always reminded us, “Hey! This is a silly comic book! Have fun!”

  • TonyStark

    Wolverine? Really? You fucking suck Deitcher. Lets single out the one X-Man whose fucking killed more people than everyone in the X-Men and Avengers combined as being a little bitch. Good call douche.

  • Floydthe Barber Beefacke

    Hilarious Article!

  • Radknight

    Hah, so glad I stopped reading comics when these guys kicked ass. Sucks though because I have so many back issues that I’ve been holding on to from their glory days that I’m sure they’re worthless now that they suck.I think I have two issues of Bishops first appearance because I knew he was gonna be a badass. Thanks Marvel ):

  • Matthew William Millett

    Dude you and I are kindred. FUCK WOLVERINE, and CYCLOPS WAS RIGHT

  • Marvelfan Forums

    I’m with you “fuck you, Wolvie”

  • Superman

    I read this article and was shocked to learned at the end that it was written by an adult. It reads like the puerile rantings of an adolescent boy who evaluates a hero based on “kewl” attributes like explicit violence, objectification of females, and has tattoos. An immature punk who thinks being anti-authority somehow equates to being hip and in vogue. A truly absurd piece of writing from so-called “comic book journalist.”

    • hendrixisgod777

      dude, go back to reading dc.

  • Geno

    CYCLOPS?!?!

  • logat890

    morph, some of the peeps in generation x, xman, adamx

  • Testify over the wall

    They’ve all bin around too long and to many writers with “bright’ ideas have gotten their hands on the characters. If there’s no end to the story and it goes on and on for decades like a soap opera things are going to have to change and that may not always be for the better. there’s also lots of Big jacket and tie business involved, now more than ever .BIG movies big investments big acquisitions Big plans and lots of money. not to different from the wrestling scene back in the day when the two big promotions were going neck in neck for ratings they were at their best then. Now the filthy rich remaining promotion gives you PG totally alienating you the guy who loves to watch chair shots , it doesn’t matter if you turn off your TV its not the Monday Night wars anymore. YES! I know comic books and wrestling are totally different but the point in there somewhere is that maybe these things are at their best when there’s a race for survival. I’m sure back in the 90s DC and or marvel at least craned their necks when Shooter & Co. first came out with Valiant or when Malibu hit the shelves lets not even start on the whole Image exodus. today Valiant is better than ever better stories than both comic Giants I daresay, but hardly a concern for either.

  • Nathan Forester

    What’s the problem with Beast?